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Welcome to another eTard guide! Today we’re looking at dying Mongolian gerbils.
Are you fed up of your Pink Eyed White being white all the time? Or how about that Argente Gold, surely she could do with some lowlights?
Fear not, for the eTard guide is here to help, with the assistance of Professor Gerbil!
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Welcome to the eTard guide to Pet Rocks!
The wonder pet of all pets! Suitable for anyone, even those that are banned from keeping your average live pets, the Pet Rock is the lowest maintenance pet avaliable, perfect for those who can’t stand feeding or taking proper care of living things, and the love it gives you back for your disregard to its existence will surely fill the void in your life!
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…is healing! Looks like he’s picked at it a little but no guts have been spilled so all is well. 
(Look at how much the damn vet shaved him! Surprised the poor bugger didn’t catch a chill or develop a nakedness complex.)
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